*dreaming...*

Pick the day. Enjoy it - to the hilt. The day as it comes. People as they come… The past, I think, has helped me appreciate the present - and I don’t want to spoil any of it by fretting about the future.

-Audrey Hepburn

i remember a lonely time last spring…i couldnt get up out of bed without feeling miserable..miserable knowing and not knowing…not knowing what would happen..not knowing if i was still loved…if all the times spent laughing and growing had meant anything..or if maybe i had missed something…maybe i had missed the fact that you felt different…that you didnt feel for me like i felt for u…the confusion of all the goals for the future we had that had suddenly been flipped and were no longer there…not knowing how that story was going to end…not knowing why you were still calling me every night and just not listening..not knowing who you were spending your time with while i lay in bed crying….crying and wondering where it had all gone wrong..and knowing i loved you.more than myself. and too much for the pain to be ignored…

sitting in this library i realize that the worse thing for humans is time. we never have enough of it and it creeps up behind us..suddenly were there. ad we dont even know how we got there…we wonder where all those hourse went…why we didnt do things sooner…why we didnt have enough time to do it all…to conquer all or dreams….all our hopes….there is just not enough time for all our hopes…

its late and its too bad youre so damn far away